Priceless Gifts For Life - Femina

Every child loves presents, but every parent has the chance to also gift them treasures whose value cannot be counted.

Yours may or may not be a family that really celebrates the end of the year with gifts, but the kids will surely be in line anyway. And while kiddie presents today are all about size, or expense, or sophistication, there are other gifts that you need to consider giving that won't cost you a rupee but will pay your child great dividends. Read on and get some ideas of your own:

The Gift Of Magic

Do your kids believe in Santa Claus?

If they're very young and don't, perhaps their skepticism unfortunately mirrors your own cynicism with the world. Young children need to believe in a world less real than it actually is - it insulates them for a while, and gives them memories on which to look back with happiness. So, if your child wants to write to Santa, or leave cookies out for him, and expects presents under a tree, make sure she gets it all - at least till she outgrows the idea.

If your older child is already over the magic, remind him of how much he used to enjoy the Santa experience when he was younger, and request him not to spoil it for younger siblings.

The Gift Of Knowledge And Tradition

Each festival and date on the calendar gives parents a chance to teach about varied cultures and events. Talk about Christmas, talk about Chanukah, talk about old-world new year rituals, even about how the idea of the New Year came to be... All part of the great cycle of passing on tradition and a comprehension of a bigger world than children know.

The Gift Of Simplicity And Perspective

When was the last time you had the courage to give someone something you made yourself? As we become adults, we take refuge in the correctness of a store-bought gift, but children innately know the value of their own creations. Tell them YOU would love to receive something they made themselves - it would show you how much they cared to make it for you. And if you encourage your children to draw their own cards and make their own small gifts for grandparents and close family members, you can awaken again in some adult the joy of knowing that something has been made EXCLUSIVELY for them - an exclusivity that is greater than that any boast of limited edition pieces can offer.

Also consider exchanging handmade gifts with the children yourself. ''I think giving children non-material gifts is an excellent idea," says psychotherapist, relationships consultant and author Dr Vijay Nagaswami. "It not only gives them a different perspective on how to value a gift, it also gives the gift giver an opportunity to gift creatively."

Help your children also to see the brilliance even in simple gifts, and remind them constantly to consider the thought processes behind the giving - the reason why they got what they did and a cousin got something else, and teach them not to judge in the context of what everyone else in school is getting.

The Gift Of A Social Conscience

The season of largesse is a great time to teach social sensitivity and to tap kids' instinctive kindness. Plan with them what they will do to share their joy with others - whether it is by calling at an old age home for a few hours and letting the elderly inmates feel the joy of having young people visit them, segregating toys and clothes they no longer play with or use for less privileged kids, or even giving up some pocket money towards providing a treat for some orphan children. (If you call any of the social organisations in your city or town, the trustees will be able to tell you how best to go about this.)

The Gift Of A Sense Of Closure

Very often and especially if the year has been traumatic for them, children need you to put life into perspective for them again. As the year draws to a close, gather your kids around you at bedtime, and help them talk about they liked and didn't in the year gone by. Then help them see how they learnt and benefited from those experiences, how they grew from them, and how life goes on...

The Gift Of A New Beginning

Remind them too, that the coming new year is a sign of a fresh start - a chance to write a new page in the book of life. Help them look forward to new learning, new fun, new experiences, and to meeting new people in the new year.

The Gift Of Yourself

"What every child truly wants is not a material gift," exhorts Dr Alvin Rosenfeld, New York child and adult psychiatrist and author of five books, including 'Hyper-parenting' with Nicole Wise. "What every child wants is a parent's time and attention,a look that lights up when they enter the room and says to them, 'I love you just the way you are'. Every child who has that present may have difficulties in life - as we all do - but because that smile is in their core, they will never be defeated by life or fall into despair. That is the greatest gift." Enough said.