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Understanding The Lesbian

Legal Aspects In Indian statute books, while there is no explicit mention of homosexuality — as in, the persecution of a person due to sexual preferences, Section 377 of the Indian Penal code lists the sexual act of sodomy as a criminal offence. The International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission (IGLHRC), in association with organisations for homosexuals in India, have been actively campaigning to have this statute amended.
There is also a call being made on the National Human Rights Commission to end psychiatric abuse against homosexuals. As Ashok Row Kavi, activist and editor of Bombay Dost , puts it, “This Aversion Therapy which includes electro-shock therapy is something that has come about in the last 15 to 20 years in India — after it was banned in the US and Europe.”

Trends Today
Speaking about homo-sexuality in India, he says, “This is not some new trend; people don’t become homosexual just to be part of some trend. It is only coming to light now because an old safety network has disappeared with the breakdown of the joint family. Even within nuclear families, the parents are at work. That’s why people call helplines. They need outside help to deal with the turbulence they go through about ‘coming out’.
Today, there are around 35 organisations for homosexuals — in the space of eight years — that says something.” He adds, “Earlier, when I used to organise gay parties, it was difficult to find 60 to 70 people attending. Today, you could have crowds going up to 300.” But despite a degree of homophobia, there are signs that homosexuality is being seen in a more tolerant light.
Ashok points out, “I think we — Humsafar Trust — are the only organisation to receive government funding — from the Mumbai District Aids Control Society. This reflects a big change in the mind set. ”
‘MY STORY’: TRUE-LIFE ACCOUNTS

Geeta Kumana Of Aanchal It took me a very long time; I came out very late — when I was 29 years old,” says Geeta Kumana, 35, director of Aanchal , a helpline and support group for lesbian and bisexual women in Mumbai. “I was seeing women at 22. At that time, I was going through an inner conflict, wondering, ‘What will society say?’.
So I was also seeing a man. He didn’t know about the woman, but the woman knew about him. Slowly, that relationship ended and then, there was another woman. Finally, I started coming to terms with the fact that I was gay. For a while, I was bisexual because in India, unlike in developed countries, bisexuality as a term gives one the comfort that you may be ‘straight’ sometimes. Actually, the man was a front and the woman was my preference.
By 31, I had accepted that I was a lesbian. My relationships were deeper with the women than with the man. The way I felt for the woman and the way I would kiss her, did not come close to how I felt for the man. I can’t understand how you can like a man. I can’t feel that loving and caring thing for a man.’’
Nastasia, Mumbai Nastasia, working with a publication in Mumbai , says, “You connect to society at many other levels beside your sexuality, and it’s not that you are totally isolated. But preferences are ‘invisiblised’ and you remain in the closet for most of your life until you decide. Coming out to myself was the biggest thing that I did.
Religion was a big issue. Being Catholic, I had to combat my feelings of homosexuality. My dad was a great support. My mother had passed away, so I did not have the chance to share it with her, which is very sad. She sort of guessed when I was very young and she would tell me these horror stories of gay and transgender women — how they were ostracised by society and how physically, they started developing hair on their chest!
After a while, we stopped connecting with each other as a mother and daughter because of my mom’s refusal to accept the way I was growing.

I was 17 when my dad saw me with my girlfriend. Initially, he was very upset and angry. Since I was with an older woman, he thought that she was leading me astray.
Then, I told him that it had been happening for a long time, only he had not known about it. Life became easier after he accepted me the way I was.’’


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