'We're women, we're young and we're happy' is the anthem of the now generation. And quite contrary to what the opposite sex might think, it does not take diamonds, a swanky car or a beachhouse to make a woman happy. It's those little things that bring on the sunshine... a warm hug from her beloved, a heart-to-heart with a pal, losing an inch from her waist...

Happiness Is Not A Destination. It Is A Method Of Life
So what makes a woman happy? As sociologist Susan Vishwanathan from Jawaharlal Nehru University (JNU) points out, "Women who have autonomy and are free to make their choices are probably happier than men primarily because those choices have been fought for and won after very recent battles. Women are happy to be out at work and cope with responsibilities at home and work. I think they count these as major victories."

Is it that sense of being able to steer their lives on their chosen tracks that makes them happy? Yes, more than ever. Preeta Verghese Arora, communications professional, Faculty for Management Studies, Pune, is clear that, "At the right time in life, I was able to take a call on what my priorities were. There was the total conviction that I wanted the best of all the worlds - family, career, relationships and of course, time for myself as a thinking individual."

Preeta is not the only one taking a call on what she wants in life. Bangalore's Susan George has reason to crow as, "I've succeeded since I've managed to get away from Kerala to come and study in Bangalore. It has been exhilarating." For 25-year-old Delhi journalist Sanghita Singh, happiness equates with being independent, meeting her deadlines and at the end of the day, being responsible for herself. Happiness for women, she believes, also comes from having come to terms with themselves and not needing any man to feel happy...

And valuing the small things... Like "When my little daughter sends me an e-mail, or when my dog cuddles up near my feet at night or when my mother calls to chat," says Radhika Dossa, 29-year-old ad filmmaker, hotelier and casting director, Pune, or "if I get back home and find my mom's cooked my favourite 'rajma' or my dad's got me flowers," says Shruti Chauhan.

Happiness Depends Upon Ourselves

Why are women happier than men? "Because they go more with their heart," believes Shivani Tibrewala, 20-something Mumbai writer and playwright. Also, because "they derive a lot of happiness from within themselves. They don't have to seek it from external sources like men do," observes Renu Bansal, marketing manager, L'Oreal Professionnel, Mumbai. It's the way women are made, really. Feels Shalini Mundada, fashion designer, Pune: "Women are very emotional but they also have great inner strength, which enables them to fulfil their responsibilities on various fronts - be it home, of family, kids or work.

A little success on any of these fronts gives a woman great satisfaction." Adds Preeta Verghese Arora, "To be happy is about looking at life in the larger perspective and this I sincerely believe, is where women score, with their inherent ability to create and nurture, their steely reserve and resolve to see things through, and go about achieving so many things with the minimum of fuss, not only in the workplace but also at home and the community at large."

Freelance artist and jewellery designer Deeksha Nath feels that men set much higher benchmarks for themselves and have to contend with societal pressure, as finally they're the ones responsible for the family, at least in the eyes of society.

So they are unlikely to go over the top about things like a new dress or a great date. Shabani Hassanwala, 23-year-old freelance journalist studying filmmaking at Jamia Milia Islamia University, Delhi, spares no quarter, "If you notice, women counsel men across all age groups! That's because in Indian society, the performance pressure is greater for the man whereas the woman is emerging as a multi-tasker with the luxury of making a choice."

Women, says sociologist Dr Nehast Quaiser, have been largely left out of the world of male competitiveness and aren't burdened by that sure happiness-killer. "What makes it worse is that a man isn't allowed to express his vulnerability as much." So while we women rave, rant, exult, the men bottle up their anxieties and pressures. Not a very happy situation, isn't it?