By Simmi Dhanda Sakhuja

Greetings to all those who are going to turn 30. So what’s it going to be? A tearful adieu to the 20s or a platform for a blast-off?

Whatever one may say, the truth is, before turning 30, everyone goes through a dilemma. What’s the fuss all about anyway? Most women cannot put a finger on their real fears. It’s the number that is scary. So far, she looks good, is having a blast being married and being a mom. But after this, what? ‘‘Well, the answer lies with you.

In fact, as girls turn wives, endearing moms, high-flying executives, they continue to groove. No more hanging up your dancing shoes, putting away mini skirts or getting matronly.

The Road To 30
On the road to 30, excitement grows for the B4U Music channel VJ Bhavna Pandey. “I am 28 and still raring to go,”she says with exuberance. Not quite complacent about her modelling and Vjing, she has just started off a career in event management where she showcased Christian Dior and La Prairie in Mumbai. Hold it, her portfolio is incomplete without her role as a wife to the actor Chunkey Pandey and being a mom to a four-year-old daughter.

“Sometimes, I think I should restrict myself only to one career. But what the heck, it’s only one life and this is just the beginning. I love to party and if my friends call me at midnight to catch up over coffee, I’m game.”

Reaching 30 can be an emotional quotient for some, but not for Maheep Kapoor. “Today, at 29, I am a wife, a mom, a daughter-in-law and a complete party animal,” she says beaming. “I don’t get bogged down by the fact that I have a little daughter therefore, I can’t do what I want. I am still into realising my dreams.” Done with her modelling and a short acting stint, this lovely woman is now studying jewellery design, a long-time passion.

‘‘I love The Way I Feel”
With all this enthusiasm in the late 20s, what happens in the 30s? Veena Gowda, 30, a lawyer, says, “Are you looking for me to say, ‘I pledge to change, settle down, to buy a house, car and a cat?’ No. Life is going to continue to be working, partying and no saving.”

Single and touching 30, there is no biological clock ticking for Rashmi*. As a marketing executive with a TV channel, she says, “I love the way I feel today. I am capable of doing what I want — of course, within social parameters. I work hard. But I also do things like rappelling in the backwaters of Kerala or taking off with my boyfriend to a vintage haveli in Jodhpur. I equally enjoy lying by myself on the beach with a glass of beer reading Kafka,” she says.

Single women in their 30s are no longer considered social oddities. “Twenty years ago, the 30s was a period of crisis for women,” says psychiatrist Dr Nirmala Rao who runs ‘Aavishkar’, a self-enrichment centre in Mumbai. “Women got married early and had children early too. By the time they reached their 30s, the kids were too grown up to fuss around and the husband, too busy. The women had spare time which they didn’t know what to do with.

“At that time, it was considered selfish to think about yourself. The result was traumatisation. It converted into physical ailments. Getting physically sick and not resolving the underlying issue of stimulating herself made a woman feel old. No one really encouraged her to do anything beyond domestic activities. She had the energy, but it was never channelised. This made a woman’s existence very dull. The women resigned themselves to the idea that this is it for them and they could go no further in life.”

Sorry, this doesn’t apply any more. Today, for a woman rolling into her 30s, life is exciting. It means reaching a stage of emotional and financial independence together with a sexual savvy that makes her stand out on her own.

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