Anish Trivedi sheds some light on the male psyche. 1 Most men are insecure little boys.
2 Most of us can’t believe that women actually want to talk to us, go out with us, sleep with us... honestly, if I were a woman, I’d be lesbian!
3 At a party, men will talk about the economy, shares, politics and cars. We talk to each other about stuff no one else cares about!

Women, on the other side of the room, talk about maids, kids, etc. We would like to come over to the other side and talk to you, but we don’t know if we can hold our own in that conversation... we’re a little out of our depth. 4 Yes, most men fall asleep after sex. It gets you out of having to talk about your feelings. Plus, whatever you may mumble to her can’t be held against you as you were half asleep at the time — instant deniability!
5 We have a problem saying ‘I love you’, but we’re cute and hairy anyway!
6 All men do not measure 12’’ in length at critical parts of our anatomy... that’s a myth propagated by women who don’t want to acknowledge to their friends that the guy they’re sleeping with is a complete loser in bed.
7 Men don’t have time to discover the ‘mystique’ in women. We want to talk to you, and briefly get to know you and go home. We do NOT want to get into your pants — that is NOT why we’re talking to you. The next day, we want to remember the great conversation we had with you.
8 Men are supposed to know how techie things work, and how to fix them — the TV, the DVD player... And if you’re dumb (and you’re trying to impress someone), you’ll try and do it. If you’re smart, you’ll find someone who can do it better.
9 Some men (I don’t and my male friends don’t!) scratch their balls on the street or in public because they have no manners and can get away with it!
10 We may look at an attractive woman, look at her again, and maybe even lust after her. But do you still feel that way after she opens her mouth? Probably not! But you women won’t believe that!
11 We’re not all insensitive jerks.
12 We discuss our sex lives with other men far less than women imagine.
13 There is no such thing as a seven-year-itch.
14 I think I am less of an ass and less obnoxious now than I used to be.
15 Some men are turned on by women who smoke cigars — something about a woman putting something, long and brown in her mouth, I guess. As far as I’m concerned, there are very few women who know how to smoke a cigar.
Got comments or questions? E-mail us at femina@timesgroup.com with ‘MEN ON MEN — Ain’t no mystery’ in the subject line.