During my early years as a hostess, I remember feeling cheated at the end of a party. It was all such hard work - people came, enjoyed themselves, ate the food that took me days to plan and prepare, and left me to do the clearing up for the next couple of days!

Now, several years later, I have begun to realise that I only had myself to blame for this. With greater planning and a few rules in mind, I could have hosted a party with ease. Not only that, I could have even enjoyed my own parties more.

Invite with care
As a rule, a minimum of eight people keeps the conversation going easily in a party. Ensure that you invite people who get along well to avoid a strained atmosphere. Also, take care that you don’t play favourites. Be clear about whether children are to be invited or not.
If not, do not give anyone the go-ahead. If you have sent out written invitations, call your guests at least a week in advance to reconfirm.

Be a charming hostess
As the hostess, you’re bringing guests together. So it’s your responsibility to help them mingle and interact. Introduce guests to each other, and make an effort to spend time with new people, for example, your new neighbours or a colleague’s wife. The idea is to make everyone feel comfortable. You will begin to see that your guests take subconscious cues from you. If you’re having a good time, they will too.

Be prepared
Plan, plan and plan. Make lists. Take an inventory of pots, pans, dishes, glasses, cutlery and napkins. Before you go shopping, clean out your fridge to make room for the new stuff. Prepare the house a day in advance. Arrange flowers early in the morning. Think out dishes that can be made a day ahead. Opt for ready-made snacks. And to finish things off, cake, cookies, or pie are all great make-ahead desserts.

In other words, see to it that you have time enough to relax, shower and dress. Keep a barbecue or tandoor handy - grilling can be fun. It’s also the perfect way to get your male guests involved.

Feed your guests well
Your menu depends on the formality - or informality - of the get-together. For example, for a formal sit-down dinner, you would want to serve a complete, well-rounded meal. For a cocktail party, you would want to focus on finger foods and drinks. For more than 10 people, a buffet would be in order. Avoid dishes that call for elaborate serving techniques or last-minute preparation. Some tips:

* Always make extra food. A party is no fun when you’re worrying about running out of a certain food.
* Select interesting foods to serve... Flavourful dishes from around the world, fashionable foods to provide contrasting colours, temperatures and textures.
* While it is generally not acceptable to ask your guests to bring a dish, never say ‘No’ when someone volunteers. It will make them feel special.
* Balance rich, dense and highly flavoured foods with simple, fresh items. Salads are healthy and filling.
* Offer enough assortments. For small gatherings of eight to 10 guests, three or four types of snacks are suitable; for parties of up to 45 guests, plan on six kinds. For variety, plan snacks from each of the following categories - meat or poultry, fish or seafood, cheese, and vegetables or fruit.
* A variety of hot and cold foods can help keep everyone nibbling, as cold appetisers can be circulated while hot ones are being fried or heated. Let your guests have a choice of stirred, deep fried, baked or grilled/barbequed/tandoori snacks.
* Your guests will be milling about the house, so stick to finger foods that aren’t messy or greasy, and are easy to pick up and hold. Keep paper napkins. Have bins in which to dispose soiled napkins.
* Keep ready some solid food like butter chicken-naan or puri-aloo, for people who would like to eat something substantial in spite of the many snacks.
* Serve safe food. Ensure that the food that you serve does not turn your party into a gastrointestinal nightmare.

Offer drinks freely but responsibly
Stock a full bar - either limit the choice to whiskey and beer, or have an array of cocktails. This really depends on the time of the day, the weather and the guest list. Also serve equally attractive mocktails for the teetotallers. Make sure alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages are served at the same location. Keep plenty of ice handy. Offer plenty of snacks to go with the drinks - low-calorie, high moisture-content foods such as raw vegetable strips and light dips. Cheeses and meats are digested slowly and slow down alcohol absorption. Also avoid salty foods. Stop serving alcohol completely about an hour towards the end of the party. If a guest drinks too much, you could offer to drive her home, arrange for her to ride with another guest, call a taxi, or invite her to stay over. While preparing an alcoholic punch, use a non-carbonated base, like fruit juice.

Create a theme for your party
Every party should evoke a particular image or effect. Go unconventional. Make your own unique style statement. Have something which your guests will remember the party by. Large pots with floating candles and flowers, an eye-catching rangoli...all these add character to your evening.

Create space for your guests
Make sure that guests have enough room to circulate and enjoy themselves. Rearrange furniture, removing coffee tables and other obstacles. Provide extra seating. A cluttered room lacks a welcoming feeling.
Voila! You are on the path to having a fabulous dinner party! And, once you have a successful party, you will be hooked.